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Final story reel

Please provide final feedback to the creators of this submission below:​

  • What did you like or love about this submission?

  • What did you find confusing or unclear?

  • What suggestions do you have to make it stronger?

Sara

Good evening from Spain! First of all, I find the idea of dinosaur-human coexistence super attractive, it seems to me a super interesting idea, and what I like the most is that in the end they find a way to coexist without harming each other (normally in this type of stories one species wins over the other). I think it's great. What I find a bit strange is the telepathy ability, I think it could be developed much more and have more importance in the story. And I think you should work a lot on the art and drawings of this short film, it seems that you couldn't upload your own illustrations.
Like I said, I love history, and I'd love to see this short film in its entirety one day. Greetings!!

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Pietro

This is a really great concept! I was a little confused about the dinosaurs living in peace with no killings. Many of them in real life were carnivorous predators, especially with the twist of them becoming herbivorous. I believe you can totally pull that off and it would be super interesting, you could maybe include a sentence on what that looks like. Your protagonist is really cool, I love how he becomes the leader. The spaceship twist is really really cool!! I love how they become herbivorous, that could lead to very funny scenes as they find out. One suggestion to make it better is to streamline the first act and make it about one specific thing, I'm not sure you need telepathy, both a spaceship and wormhole (you could have some weird natural event that sucks them into the present), dinosaurs could learn how to talk, I would also try to turn every scene that's based on dialogue into an action-driven moment, instead of debates there could be chases and people capturing. Finally, I would focus a little more on your protagonist's internal journey. I love your ending, it almost leads to a sequel! I see you use some art from Dinotopia which was one of my favorite books when I was a kid. Really great. I hope you continue developing this story, it has amazing potential. TCongratulations!

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Arabu

I really love it. It was really unexpected to me. Really loved it

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Diego

I love love love this story and narration, it is so cute and many real things happen, like the "complete disaster" of the first town hall meeting, because it is what happens in reality that you want to say something important and everything goes into a complete failure, but sometimes you make the effort to get other chances to get heard.

The story and narration are completely clear, I really liked the evolution of this idea coming to its final form, all elements which were unclear from past weeks have been solved and answered smartly and entertainingly!

It is a strong and clear story, I wouldn't recommend anything but I would like to see more of your stories in the future, please continue this path on storytelling, you have managed to find and share your particular vision of life and that reflects in your work, meaning reflects in your work and it will continue to do so on anything that you work on, that is why we would like to see more of your stories or your way to tell the stories, also your narration is super good, thank you for sharing your work!

-Team Raining Frogs
https://www.storyxperiential.com/media/97fa95bf-6eea-44b3-ae75-bb6ebed70d6e

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Nazish

I really liked your idea about Dinosaurs time travelling from the past and entering the world of today. Thats a very creative idea. I do think that it might help if the dinosaurs did something to help the people in some way, that it would have been a more satisfying way to change the people's mind about them. If people were going to spy, maybe have bad person spy on them and create false stories just because he doesn't want to share the world with them. But then one of the dinosaurs can prove what they are really like when they come to the aid of people in a way that they need it. Perhaps by their size they can create a damn that would prevent a disastrous flood from happening. Also, one thing that was unclear to me was in the beginning when it was stated that because of Rex's telepathic ability he like to search for adventure. I wasnt' able to make the connection there. Perhaps he could have a desire to search for adventure and through that, he discovers that he has a telepathic ability. I would also ask yourself if you want Rex to learn anything, or change in any way through out this story. If so, in what way would that happen? These are just some thoughts for consideration. I like your idea, and I feel like you could have a lot of fun with this.

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Jason

kinda hard for me to believe. first of all, it is hard for me to read the auto captions because the accuracy is not that good. Also, changing from carnivore to plant eater, is there enough plants for them to eat without causing balance in nature to change, can ecosystem and current animals support dinosaurs? Are they intelligent at first? If they have intelligence but do they have no language? I like the time dilation part, that makes a lot sense.

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Hansen

The story of a telepathic dinosaur is interesting, but I think his ability could play a larger role in the story's climax.

As it stands now, it seems as though the dinosaurs are accepted by humanity due to chance, and not due to the actions of the main character, which would make the story more compelling, in my opinion.

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Melissa (1 like)

The story concept of a dinosaur time travelling to deal with humans today is interesting. I need to see more of story conflict, plot, and character development to really connect more to this story.

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John-Charles (1 like)

I love the idea of dinosaurs coming from their time to having to cold with the future. I was a little confused on the sequence of events, there's a few beats that just happen and I'm not sure why-- where does a spaceship come from or how does Rex become king if he's an outcast? I think this story could be stronger by turning the focus on Rex's story more than the group of dinos at large, maybe figure out what his internal arc is and put that at the core of the narrative

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Alia (1 like)

Rex's outsider perspective is relatable and it makes sense he would entertain himself. I'm confused as how Rex found a spaceship and why he thought it would be a good idea to take it to outerspace? Also, I wasn't sure why Rex waited for his dinosaur friends to die before he talked to the mayor? In addition, I was unclear about how many dinosaurs arrived on Earth.

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An adventure of dinosaur who time travelled and forced to deal with the new reality with humans

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Phoenix
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