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7

Week

The Little Apprentice - rough edit

I think the story was shown great through the drawings

7

Week

ELIXIR - STORY SPINE

Your Story was truly epic. Thank you. I love that you picked Mexico. Your are reminds me of the book of life.

7

Week

Rugula's Voice

I enjoyed the ending of the story

7

Week

GRANDFATHER - ROUGH STORY REEL

Wonderful job with the story in the conclusion I love how you push the story out to the young boy is now an adult and found his happily ever after. It is still sad to see the boy lost you know so much of his family his youth, but this is what happens in reality and that's what makes this story wonderful. great job with the story overall.

7

Week

Act 3 Mona

I've enjoyed watching your video over the last three weeks and seeing the progression of your story. great job I really love the animation of your story. the work is quite beautiful and stunning I hope that you continue to use this in your profession on the outside.

7

Week

Samson the magical Sword - Storyreel

I love the concept of a weapon of war being used as a tool to heal the landscape. All too often in society right now when we think of the concept of weapons of war you think about the devastation that which it has upon the environment. but coming from a soldier’s background I believe that weapons are just tools and can be used for good as well so it's wonderful to see this sword that is able to heal the earth and provide good harvest for local populations with its magic. this is a real wonderful story and I look forward to seeing more of it over the next couple of weeks.

6

Week

Act 2

From watching last week story I had no idea that there was gonna be a little gremlin or little monster. This was amazing and really a great little in addition to a story I love when you see a a plot twist that you had no idea was coming. to be honest I thought it was just a cat inside the building by looking at the art initially. fabulous job.

6

Week

The Little Apprentice - Act Two

I completely understand the problems that you're having this week it's been really hectic for my family as well where I'm not hitting the deadlines properly right now. all you can do is the best that you can with a given situation I think your story is still wonderful and whimsical. I would recommend even if you are not able to complete this project by the end of the eight weeks continued working on it because your story is lovely and I think it would look great over the course of the next few years if you're wanting to make this into a long story that's 30 minutes to an hour to a few hours if it's like a miniseries I think that this would be a wonderful concept to continue moving with.

6

Week

Grandfather - Act 1 and 2

the story which you have displayed in this two segments it's quite powerful emotionally gripping. thank you for sharing it with the group. I look forward to seeing the conclusion of this story. I love how the art styles are changing periodically through this work. It is clear that you took a lot of time and careful consideration of your story. Great Job.

6

Week

Rugula's Passion

I love seeing your character in color it's just beautiful. I would like to see more of your characters interaction with the human. I'm sure that that's what you're intending to do but I love the interaction between these two characters. I also love meeting her friend and having the friend assist in designing clothing kind of like monsters Inc except for maybe much older demographic this could be a really good story regardless of the fact great job this week I look forward to seeing next week

6

Week

Lost in translation

Great job on week 6 so, I do have one big question does everybody hear the same exact song or is it that they are all hearing different songs but coming from the same shell. I don't know it's just something that kind of makes me think. it is wonderful that this story is connecting people together whether they realize it or not based upon these shells.

6

Week

SMOKE ME

This was delightful thank you very much. I really enjoyed your vision for the story. it's amazing what the power of a wish can do. But most importantly as anybody that has ever loved somebody or even been infatuated by somebody, we don't always realize that we can do a lot of harm the people that we care about. So, I look forward to seeing the conclusion fear story. As a former smoker I've never felt so inclined and hopeful for the cigarette to win.

5

Week

Storm Hero - Act 1


I look forward to seeing these two characters grow and develop and to see who is going to win in the story.

5

Week

Rugula's Passion Act 1


So did your monsters and humans ever interact in the past to explain why they have their beliefs in one another. I know it may not necessarily be important but as a background piece I think that that would be kind of interesting.

5

Week

Hello

I love that your story is ultimately about generations.

5

Week

Smoke Me - Act One

I actually really do enjoy yours I feel like this cigarette, or the flicker of the ash is a phoenix being reborn. This phoenix finds love in its creator, and I think it's quite beautiful and its simplicity. great job I look forward to seeing more of this project.Is the problem of this story that the cigarette loves the individual yet either individual doesn't see it more than just as a cigarette?

4

Week

The magical sword - Storyspine

I enjoy that the sword is not actually a weapon but it instrument, but it still retains a double edge. I look forward to hearing the dialogue between the two main characters both in the beginning and as it transitions towards the end and the reconciliation

4

Week

Marin the Shapeshifter- Story Spine

I love how the shapeshifter becomes an adventurer overtime no intentionally it feels like a natural transition of the character as they're developing. so great job on the character development. Do you plan to explore more in depth the shape shifters the back story or kind of like beauty and the beast where are you don't actually see the story you just get a quick synopsis.

4

Week

The Little Apprentice

As a parent the story really gets to me on a personal level. I love how the father and sub bonding with the child in the end when he thinks the child is a nuisance in the beginning and I think his parents from time to time we think this way not realizing the opportunities at which we have. I know that this isn't part of the main story but I'd kind of like to know backstory of the mother.

4

Week

Two Witches and a Star

First, I love your art it's whimsical in simplistic and a great way. I love the moral the story. One thing I think I'd like to see worked on within your work is I'd love to see the actual argument in dialogue form. I look forward to seeing the progression of your project over the next couple of weeks.

4

Week

Story Spine

I am curious about where the story is going I know that you want to keep it as a surprise but I think that it will help if you elaborate just a little bit. Next, I like how you're talking about there's going to be a major setback I'm curious to know what causes the setback.

4

Week

The Antique Store Story Spine

When I first heard the story going I had no idea what was going to happen with the mirror. And because of the surprise of what happened with the magic of this mirror put a smile on my face. Overall, I love your concept I would love to see this story expanded more. One of the things that comes to my mind for expanding the story is maybe the ghosts explain why this mirror is so special.I'd like to also know why the owner of the store doesn't want to interact with people outside of business.

2

Week

Google

I am totally confused by Google but that is what I love about the idea of Google. Idea of think like Google remind me of golem for a game I play call Magic. Thank you for sharing your idea. Does google live in the internet or the real world just connecting to techolegy. I an curious to them and their culture what is the specifics of the cracked masks. Do they hope to complete the mask or is the cracked mask a coming to age ritual. I really love this idea I hope to learn more about it Google

2

Week

Character Profile: Meet Fuga

I'm curious about your character's back story and I would love to know what the mission is. it is really sad to also hear how your character lost it's entirely family because of a crash landing. I'd also be curious to understand the story about how it is coping in a world where it doesn't belong.

2

Week

Amelia

I'm a little confused on what Amelia’s motivations are in this story. Is it go on an adventure with pets where is it to be an artist or combination there? I do really enjoy the art love how colorful the background. I love the shirt of Amelia’s I'm also curious does she have the ability to understand the pets that are making their animal sounds.

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Derek's Comments

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